Dear God

Dear God,

I feel the need to write you a letter of prayer to ask for your forgiveness. It seems that I have been at a loss for words with you these days, and my prayers are not as often or as heartfelt as they should be. I have neglected you even though I know you have not left my side for even a second. I have had a difficult time, and I have unrightfully placed a lot of the blame on you. God, I am sorry for not trusting you... for steering away from the path you have paved for me. I'm sorry for letting go of your hand and for traveling in the opposite direction than you have shown me. I'm sorry for doubting you and for not being patient with you, even though you have had all the patience in the world for me. I'm sorry for being selfish and for thinking more about myself instead of other people. I have been angry with you. I have felt bitter, and you were the easiest for me to blame -so it seemed. I have had a hard time understanding why you would let me go through such heartbreak, when I felt I did not deserve it. I have not allowed myself to see the light but rather just hid in the dark. I am sorry for coveting what other people have, even though I know it is a sin. I see a pregnant woman, and I want to be her. I see a woman holding a baby, and I want to be her. I see a woman able to share ultrasound pics and talk about baby names with her friends, and I want to be her. I see pictures of other peoples' babies, and I want them to be mine. I have tried to control my jealousy, but it's not been easy for me. I'm sorry for letting it go too far. I know that I can't have control over everything in my life, and I'm sorry for losing faith in you. I've been lost, and I didn't exactly know how to find my way. I'm sorry for moving too quickly rather than standing still and letting you move me. I'm sorry for giving up on you. I ask that you be with my family and I, and do what you feel is best for us. Most of all, I pray that you help me to find some comfort, peace, and understanding along the way. That is all I can ask of you. I pray for all of my family and friends, as I know that I'm not the only one dealing with struggles. Everyone is going through something in life that could use prayer and ultimately your healing power. You are a mighty God, and I know you will watch over all of us. Also, please give a kiss to my angel mother for me.

"Beautiful Lord, wonderful Savior, I know for sure, all of my days are held in your hand, crafted into your perfect plan. You gently called me into your presence, guiding me by your Holy Spirit. Teach me dear Lord to live all of my life through your eyes. I'm captured by your holy calling. Set me apart, I know your drawing me to yourself. Lead me, Lord I pray." -"The Potter's Hand"

In Your Holy Name,

Amen.